"Is this Mr. Grizzard?" 

"Yes." 

"Mr. Lewis Grizzard?" 

"Speaking." 

"Mr. Grizzard, this is The Newnan Times-Herald in Newnan, Ga." 

"What a pleasant surprise. My hometown newspaper's calling." 

"Mr. Grizzard, we have some questions for you." 

"Is this about erecting a statue of me on the courthouse square?" 

"No, Mr. Grizzard. What we want to know is, did you or did you not play basketball and baseball on the Varsity Newnan High teams from 1962 through 1964?" 

"I did." 

"Mr. Grizzard, are you aware of the trend of ex-athletes turning in their schools for various violations?" 

"You mean like Eric Ramsey of Auburn and Gene Jelks of the University of Alabama?" 

"Precisely." 

"Well, I've read a little here and there. Both Ramsey and Jelks have told the press they received illegal payments from coaches and alumni while they were at school." 

"That is correct." 

"What does that have to do with me?" 

"The Times-Herald has reason to believe that while you were an athlete at Newnan High you might have received illegal offerings from coaches and alumni." 

"You're not talking about the food they used to buy us on road trips are you?" 

"So, you admit it." 

"Well, I guess so. We played a basketball game one night against Headland High School in suburban Atlanta and after the game the bus stopped at Shoney's and we all got a free dinner." 

"And what did you have, Mr. Grizzard?" 

"Well, it's been 30 years but I seem to recall something about ordering the Half Pound O' Ground Round, medium well." 

"And how about strawberry pie for dessert?" 

"I might have had that, but I'm not sure." 

"Don't dally around with us, Mr. Grizzard. Several former teammates have told us the starting team - of which you were a member - all had strawberry pie for dessert, which is a violation of the Georgia High School Scholastic Association rules of no dessert with road game meals." 

"OK, I had the pie, but I didn't inhale." 

"Is it also true, Mr. Grizzard, that on the way home from a road trip baseball game the coach bought you two sliced pork barbecue sandwiches at Sprayberry's Barbecue in Newnan?" 

"That's true, but I paid for my own onion rings." 

"Are you sure?" 

"Yeah, the coach ran out of money." 

"Might a school booster have paid for your onion rings?" 

"We didn't have any school boosters." 

"Why is that?" 

"We were 1-12 at the time. " 

"Mr. Grizzard are you certain you aren't trying to cover up anything? Many former athletes are coming clean about how they were taken advantage of during their school days." 

"Well, the coaching staff didn't awaken me every morning to make certain I was in class on time, and they didn't come home with me at night to make certain I did my homework, and they gave me all that free food, so I guess you could say they used me for my athletic prowess and nothing else." 

"May we quote you on that, Mr. Grizzard?" 

"As long as you don't point out that when we got jock itch they gave us free powder. I'd hate to get my alma mater in any trouble." 

"How quaint. See you on the front page."