This brought harsh reaction from leading feminists around the country, including my personal secretary, the lovely and talented Miss Wanda Fribish. 

Miss Fribish, as well as being my personal secretary, also is commandette of the 403rd Bombardier Wing of the local chapter of the Fightin' Feminists. 

She has been quite active in the fight for women's rights, claiming responsibility for the stink-bombing of three Jaycee meetings and two strip joints around the Atlanta area where women take off their clothes and are nothing more than sex objects for drooling men who go to those places. 
 

Wanted a few days off
 

Miss Fribish asked for a few days off in order to go to Washington so she could deal with Mr. Regan. 

"I'll show that smart-mouthed pig who understands what!" explained Miss Fribish, resplendent in her camouflage outfit and designer combat boots. 

Fortunately for Mr. Regan, however, Miss Fribish already had used all her days off during the recent Fightin' Feminists maneuvers which took place at a secret training site somewhere near the Big Chicken in Marietta. 

As most of my readers know, I am foursquare behind the women's movement, especially when Miss Fribish is standing over me and my typewriter with a pair of brass knuckles. 

I must admit, however, that until the harsh reaction toward Mr. Regan's remark, I didn't know that women not only could understand the complicated issues of the summit, but actually would want to do so. 

I must further admit that I, like a lot of other men, were under the mistaken illusion that women still dealt in what has been known as "girl talk." 
 

Gatherings at parties
 

Take a party, for instance. After everybody stands around with a drink in one hand and a sausage ball in the other, the men go in the den and the women go into the kitchen. 

Men talk about sports, politics, the prime rate and occasionally tell humorous stories with a sexual angle. 

Women gather in the kitchen. We thought they were talking about cute things their children said, recipes, fashion, upcoming Tupperware parties and neighborhood gossip. 

Apparently, we were wrong. Women were in the kitchen discussing complicated national and international issues. 

"I'll tell you one thing, Madge," they apparently were saying, "if we don't get stringent verification methods, then I would say the arms talks were not worthwhile." 

"I agree, Sylvia, but at least the meetings between Reagan and Gorbachev were cordial, but frank." 

Donald Regan owes the women of this country an apology because they did understand the complicated issues of the Geneva Summit. I just hope they aren't so angry they won't do their male counterparts a big favor by now explaining them to us.